Ok so that bullocks banner which I complained about previously is not even a fucking dland banner! it goes here!
what a bunch of shit. I finally clicked on it just so I could tell the dlander how bloody annoying their banner was (I'm not really into the hate mail deal, but damn, I had a drink or five so I'm not really caring right now) and it doesn't even go to dland!! WTF??
I submitted a "tech request" as such:Not to be completely obnoxious, but here i go anyway.... What in the WORLD is some outside banner survery junk (URL above) which replicates all the obnoxious popup crap we onliners deal with on almost every other internet site doing in diaryland? The survey link is NOT to a diaryland survey, and may eventually be to a diaryland diary (i didnt follow the trail), but REALLY... i thought it was some dlanders "clever" banner but refused to link to it due to it's similarity to all the annoying whatnot i ignore on other sites. but out of curiosity i finally clicked on it and its not even to a dland site!! how did that get approved??? i've complained about it on my diary, which is read by few and far between, and got several comments on my diary equivalant to --go sister! i just don't understand. i'm really not trying to be a pain here, and i completely appreciate this site, but i dont need outside junk interfering either--that's part of why i LIKE this blogsite.
So...we'll see what the response is and I'll post it here. It's really not THAT big of a deal in the scheme of things, but it is annoying. And I fuckin swear you had to be a member and your link had to go to dland and if something is going to be that annoying..well anyway. You get the point.
So I got my first REJECT letter today. From a job app on January 5th. YAY! This is Rejection, my friend, my only friend, Rejection. (The Doors, anyone?). I don't feel terrible, because they had 98 applicants for the job, and although I am skillful in the particularities of the position, I do (runon sentence sentance spelling splelelelechecker is the enemy anyone anyone summore anyone) not have background experience with troubled youth of color. That is whom the nonprofit(np) serves, and could probably be better served by someone with experience in that arena. Anyway the last np job I interviewed for I was one of 7 interviewees of the 60+ people that applied to get the job. So there are probably at least 80 other people that got the same rejection. At least the org had the decency to send out the reject letters one by one instead of as a mass mailing.
Eh, whatevs. All I can really do is keep an eye on job openings and keep applying. Being broke drives me nuts but we are paying our bills on Ponge's salary so it's not like we're destitute or anything. Anyway I've applied now to about 20 fulltime np jobs and surely, eventually, one of them has to bear fruit.
Why np? Well, I became really enamored with np by working for a certain np while in college--first as an admin assistant, then a program assistant, then I ran the statewide program I was previously assisting, then I organized a campus chapter. I didn't get paid for shit (8/hour my final year) but I LOVED what I did. It was stimulating, it was educational, it was challenging, it was for the good of humanity/the earth/life/whatnot, it kept me from being overwhelmed & depressed about our apocolypic state, it made me realize I could actually effect change (yes, small, but small plus small plus small eventually equals BIG in the long run if we don't all die before then but at least I fuckin' TRIED), it was my savior in a lot of ways. And it was goddamned obnoxious and petty and shitty and stressful and ridiculous and everything else. But it gave me a vision of what I want to do with my life and muther fuck I am going to try to do what I feel I can! I'm young, I'm inexperienced, I know that np is not necessarily the best way, but I do have to earn some damn capitol also and SHIT.
The difference between giving money and organizing is extreme. On the one end, you are building a house for someone or giving some food to someone. These are immediate needs which must be met and I don't think that should be discontinued. On the other end you are organizing so that whatever it is you are working on that gets people in a place where they need "handouts" isn't a fundemental of our society's structure anymore. Whether that be racism, sexism, ism ism ism, basic lack of opportunity, basic cards stacked in favor of the few. whatever. You have short term goals that are only made in mind of a long term goal and you incorporate your allies and foes and targets and public education and the whole deal. It's beautiful. And I just want a chance to do that for a living, and this is how I'm trying to get there again.